Far From Home
by Little Winney
Summary: When dark secrets of Halstead's past resurface how Jay will manage to save his relationship with Erin and his place in the unit ?


**_Merry Christmas everyone. I'm back with a new story, I know I didn't finish the last one but I don't have so much idea for this one right now. Anyway, just for you to set this story it take place after the last episode, Called in dead. Burgess has been shot but she's alright now and Lindsay took the job. This story will talk about child abuse and will treat some other touchy subject also it's a linstead story mostly based on Jay and his past and (like you read in the summery) the secrets he keeps from everyone._**

**_ I'm sorry for the mistake but I'm French, even if I try my best I can't assure you that there will be no mistakes.  
><em>**

**_ I hope you will like it._**

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><p>Sat at a table at Molly's, they cheers at Burgess's health and Erin new job. But one of them wasn't all happy. Jay was like his coworker smiling and drinking but a part of him was sad, sad to not seeing her tomorrow. If he is sure of something is that she gonna miss him even if they still see each other after work. It will never be the same. Things will never be the same without her. However a small smile was set at the corners of his lips. He was happy for her and most of all he was proud of her. Suddenly his eyes catch hers, they stare at each other for a few moment forgetting everyone around, it's like they were alone, just the two of them.<p>

"You're gonna miss me Lindsay." He whispered under his breath.

"You're gonna miss me too Halstead."

"Hey no, no tears guys." Ruzek said putting his hand on Halstead's shoulder.

"I wasn't going to cry." Jay protest.

"Whatever." He said moving his hand. "So what do you guys do for Christmas ?" But before anyone could say something Adam continue to talk. "Because I was thinking we could do something together what do you say ?"Jay watched his friends agreed to Adam proposition as he stay dumb. Christmas is just a day like others for him, he never did something special expect some time he passed with the Corson's. But even there, it didn't feel right, Jay didn't feel at his place even if he love the Corson's he always felt like a he was to much. If he should be honest he would tell that he don't like those celebration. It's all about family and he doesn't have one. Well he does but his family is like Erin's. It's a real mess.

"And you Jay, what do you say ?"

"I..." He start but didn't say much. This time he couldn't lie. "Sorry but...I don't really like those...celebration."

"It's a no ?" Adam ask him a little disappointed by his answer.

"Yeah, it's a no."

Then a awkward silence take place between them and Jay felt suddenly guilty. He may be would have lied and say that he was with the Corson's, after all, every years they ask him to come and sometime he did last year but other time he just doesn't shows up. He stay at his apartment watching at the picture of his little sister, Abbygial. His sister he haven't see in years. He didn't even know if she was still alive and now after all those years, he just don't care anymore. Although his sister suffered, she always has the habit to forget that he suffered to. His eyes still lost somewhere he heard his coworker talking again. Jay soon forgot about his sister and let his mind focused totally on Erin and he realize one thing. They didn't work together anymore, maybe it was what they were both waiting for, maybe it was finally the right time to have their one day.

"I'm gonna go." Jay said as he got up and took is wallet to paid his beer.

"Wait for me." Erin replied as she follow him after letting a few dollars on the table.

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><p>They didn't sat a words since they passed the door. None of them dared saying something, they were just enjoying each other company. Jay start to slowly loose himself in her eyes. They couldn't tell how long they stay here staring at each other before saying anything. But after a few moment Erin finally break the silence, talking about how she would love to spent some time with her brother for Christmas.<p>

"And what stop you ?" He ask her raising an eyebrow.

"My mother." She admit quickly. "I want to be a part of the life of Teddy again but my mom...that's different. I don't think I will ever be able to sat around a table with her talking about everything and nothing."

"Oh yeah i see." He replied thinking about his adoptive father. "You should spend Christmas with him anyway, I'm sure he would be happy to spent some time with his sister. And she's not the mother of years so...my advice. Took your brother out for Christmas, make him feel better, make him feel love and forget about your mother." He said with a small smile on his lips.

"I didn't thought about that. What about you ?" She dared asking him but as she expect he didn't answer. "If you change your mind, it's at Voight's house, I'm sure he will be happy to have you for Christmas."

A little laugh escape his lips, as he thought about him going at his boss's house for Christmas with her _"daughter"_ who is off limit. The smile even grown and he laughed loudly. She smile and punched his arm. She didn't have to say that she was serious, Jay already knows that her offer was real.

"I will think about it I promise." He said his hand on his chest.

"You promise you will ?"

He silently nodded trying his best to consider the idea of joining her for Christmas even if it was hard for him. If he must be honest he would tell that he hate holidays, Christmas or Thanksgiving. He passed seven years of his life in a orphanage. They didn't celebrate Christmas with gift back there, it was all about the religion. When he arrived in this orphanage he was six, he was just a little boy frightened by what people could do. He was thirteen when he left this horrible place for a home with a bunch of scars on his body but not all of them are visible. At the beginning he really thought that it was the end of pain but he was wrong. It's in this family that he met Abigail. The little girl and him had one thing in common. They both wanted to be loved unfortunately, it wasn't a family full of love. But at least they have each other. Jay would have done anything for her and she would have done anything for him.

After a few moments Jay listened Erin confide some details about her mother, her childhood, it wasn't that much but it was a good start. At least she was able to tell more about her past. She told him how she began to take drugs and even how she met Charlie. And at some point she lowered her head. Jay slowly put his left hand under her chin and gently lifted it.

"Don't ever be ashamed of yourself." He whispered looking at her deeply in her eyes.

"If you knew what I did. I did horrible things Jay..."

"So do I. Nothing of what you will tell me will change the way I look at you. Nothing." He finish under his breath.

She stared at him not knowing what to say, for a moment she even find herself lost in his eyes. She was glad to have him, glad to be his friend and she was sad to leave him. She will not be able to see his face every day or to hear him complain about the fact that she's always the one who drove. His speeches about the history of the world will miss her, the passion in his eyes when he look at her, his smile. Everything will miss her about him.

"Thank you Jay."

"Anytime." He replied a small smile on his lips.

She feel Jay gently grab her hand, he didn't have to say anything more. This little touch mean everything for her and show that no matter what Jay will always be there for her.

"I probably should get going. It's gonna be late."

"Wait." She stop putting her hand on his arm and catch this weird look on his face which took only a few seconds for disappear but for a moment she thought he was afraid of something. Since she now Jay, she notice a few things about him. He didn't to be catch by the arm like she just did, he had some problems to control his anger, and sometime he can be very unpredictable and aggressive. "Good night Jay." She smile letting his arm go.

"Good night Erin." He whispered placing a gentle kiss on the corner of her lips then he took a step back staring at her for a few seconds and placed his lips against hers. He feel her hand on his neck as he came closer to her, pressing her body against him. After a moment Erin place a hand on his chest as they eyes meet.

"Why did you do that ?" She ask him her voice barely audible.

"You're a detective Lindsay and a good one, I'm sure you will figure out." He said with a smile making his way to the door.

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><p><strong><em>So tell me, how did you find chapter ? Tell your honest opinion about it, it can only help me. Anything you would like to see in the next chapter ? If so just tell me in the review of PM. As you want.<em>_ :)_**


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